Dealing with Loss

“Death is not the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.”

~ Norman Cousins

It’s been quite a devastating couple of years, hasn’t it? So many losses. So many. It’s like everyone is dying. From iconic greats to our very own closest and beloved. So many lights that keep our lives illuminated put out forever. Leaving us in darkness. To try and find our way again. To see the beauty in life again . . .

But it is hard. Honestly, some days it’s even hard to breathe, let alone get out of bed and carry on with the motions of our day to day routines. They seem meaningless without these people. Like part of us died along with them. I personally have become a sort of recluse, in my own weird way. Confining myself to my own solitude whenever possible. Forcing smiles and laughter and cheer when interacting with others, which honestly, I really could do without. I have preoccupied myself with trivial pursuits: obsessing over planning a makeover for my room, buying trinkets all over the place (retail therapy, anyone?), reading just to get lost in another world. Drowning myself in music and anything else that either drenches me in the gloom or completely removes me from it. No middle ground. I feel like I am not the same person I used to be. But that is all part of coping. We all have our personal ways of getting through it. Because loss is just that – personal.

So whatever loss you are facing, like me, like so many others, you have to remember that life is for the living. The pain never goes away. But you get better at progressing. You get better at being you again. You laugh a genuine laugh. Feel joy. Enjoy light moments. Find new things that make life brighter. No matter how trivial. You forgive yourself (or at least try to) for all the things you feel you did wrong, could have done better, done more. And you keep going. You heal. Slowly. Because you just must. For the others who depend on you. For yourself. For the departed. Life is for the living. So we live . . . one day at a time.

signature Oshinity

4 Comments

  1. Tejal June 23, 2016 / 4:24 pm

    Wow! I can’t lie, I can totally relate to this. Sometimes some people leave and the whole world changes. Your perspective, your smiles, your life. And you feel like you have become a whole new person. That there is a hidden silence and sadness behind the smiley face that everyone sees. But like you said eventually we have to cope. Life is a gradual process and we eventually adapt either by embracing the our new selves or by finding another goal. Personally I dedicate my all to bringing a positive effect on other people’s lives. Wow! I just realized I’ve said so much! I’ll stop here.

    • Oshin June 24, 2016 / 4:07 pm

      *sigh* life eh? I’m sory for your losses and i’m glad you’ve managed to find a reason to go on and more than that, to make sure others have it better 🙂 God bless, Tejal. And there’s no limit. Glad you shared. xo.

  2. bankelele July 10, 2016 / 8:52 am

    My dad’s passing set me off on a new life path.

    • Oshin July 11, 2016 / 1:13 pm

      I believe it made you step up in ways you didn’t think you could, right?

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